Bobbing AroundVolume Ten, Number Six
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*About Bobbing Around
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A contestThe only SENSIBLE speed limitI've recently returned from Hobart, Tasmania where I saw a 30 Km/h speed limit for the first time in my life. I think it's going in the right direction -- but not far enough. The only sensible speed limit is... ZERO. Think about all the many huge benefits:
OK, here is a contest for you. Come up with more items to be added to this list, and I will send you a FREE copy of the best book I have written. It's just finished, not published yet, so you can get in early. Bobbing Around is COPYRIGHTED. No part of it may be reproduced in any form, at any venue, without the express permission of the publisher (ME!) and the author if that is another person. You may forward the entire magazine to anyone else. I am responsible for anything I have written. However, where I reproduce contributions from other people, I do not necessarily endorse their opinions. I may or may not agree with them, but give them the courtesy of a forum. |
A letter to the Editor
A Precedents Day Message: Do We Take a Cue From Egypt... Or Stay Stuck in "We-Gypped?" by Swami Beyondananda
Currently, the Australian government is trying to introduce a carbon tax. As far as doing anything about climate change, it's a pitiful measure, but it has all the vested interests up in arms. They have mounted s huge media campaign, and have swung public opinion to the point that if an election were held now, the government would be thrown out because of the issue. This is my take on it, in the 200 words allowed in a Letter to the Editor:
There IS something wrong with a carbon tax: too little too late.
Since the start of the Industrial Revolution, each generation has stolen from its future. WE are the future bearing the consequences. In the 1960s I refuelled my car for $2. If there had been a carbon tax then, we'd now have replaced petrol. We face peak oil because past and present energy prices haven't reflected energy cost.
Climate change has already killed Australians. It's not like turning on a switch, but increased energy for all weather patterns: worse droughts, bushfires, floods, cyclones. The 1983 fires had an index of 93. 2009: 150. The recent floods have been the worst in history. The latest cyclone was Category 5. This is what climate change does.
You are paying high food, petrol and many other costs because past generations have stolen from you.
If we don't make hugely radical changes, billions will die, including many Australians. Maybe you or people you love.
But there is hope. Support the carbon tax, as a wholly inadequate but necessary first step. Cope with its cost by redesigning everything to reduce society's addiction to cheap energy. If it's hurting you, try energy conservation. Huge savings are possible.
"They [political parties] serve to organize faction, to give it an artificial and extraordinary force; to put, in the place of the delegated will of the nation, the will of a party, often a small but artful and enterprising minority of the community..."
"A house divided cannot stand."
"Those who fail to learn the lessons of history get an F and have to take the course over again."
More than ever before, America needs a new precedent -- government of the people, by the people and for the people where the government does OUR bidding, not the bidding of the highest bidder.
At this moment, we see the "bidderness" escalating -- angry union people on one side seeking both to preserve their jobs and the valuable services they provide to their communities, and angry Tea Partiers on the other side enraged by the great banking robbery, and mobilized "to a Tea" against the wrong enemy.
The game-controllers are smugly smiling. If things go as "planned," red tribe Americans and blue tribe Americans will face off against one another, while the real bandits steal away with the loot. While Egypt has birthed a people's revolt against revolting people, we here in "We-Gypped" fruitlessly fight one another.
Fortunately, the game-changers have a different plan -- to bring Americans from all sides together to answer three questions: What's so? So what? Now what? What's the story behind the story, and who's in charge of who's in charge? And... what do we do about it?
Think this level of discourse is impossible? Think again. It's been done, and it's being done. If I sound like a broken record, it's because I've been immersed in political stuff for over 40 years, and the transpartisan movement is the first thing I have seen that can catapult us outside the political matrix. Until that time, we the people are our own worst enemy, and the body politic will continue to be immobilized by autoimmune dysfunction.
If the latest bad-doings have your hackles up (or if your hackles are down in depressed resignation), PLEASE invest what you would spend on a movie and perhaps two hours of your time to read about a true political "hero's journey," and how ordinary citizens can access extraordinary wisdom and change the political game.
"Yes, yes, yes," I can hear you fulminating (we've become a nation of fulminators), "but THOSE PEOPLE believe toxic lies and they will NEVER CHANGE!" People get manipulated into believing lies by making them fearful ... and what we have discovered is that when people are brought together in a safe setting where they are listened to and respected, what INEVITABLY happens is that they begin to compare notes and uncover "the likeliest story" together.
The dysfunctional function of mainstream media is to make sure that left and right NEVER have a civil conversation together. It would be too dangerous to the status quo if We, the People discovered we pretty much all harbor the same suspicions about the corporate state.
In order to "overgrow" that dysfunction, we must be willing to engage with others we disagree with. As Swami says, "If we want peace in the Middle East, first we must make peace in the Middle West."
Here's to a brand new Precedent ... We, the People electing ourselves.
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Green building in Philadelphia by Katie Kerr
When you think of green building, chances are utilities aren't the first client that comes to mind. However, with the help of Philadelphia- based Re:Vision Architecture, Pennsylvania's largest electric and natural gas utility, PECO, installed a 45,000-square-foot vegetated green roof on its headquarters in central Philadelphia.
The largest in urban Pennsylvania, the roof soaks up more than 1.5 million gallons of rainwater runoff annually, reduces air temperatures in the summer and provides a habitat for wildlife. Through this partnership, RVA brings green building to a truly mainstream client.
"For us, it's about removing barriers to green building," says Principal Scott Kelly.
At RVA, the architects' job description goes beyond traditional responsibilities to include sustainability consulting, education and even project fundraising. RVA's immersion approach, often including a community-based Green Design Charrette to kick off a project, means that every employee is a director of sustainability, every project an opportunity to inspire and educate other businesses to adopt its triple bottom line approach. The entire project is a collaborative process, exposing everyone, from the client to the contractor, to a new way to work. "All of the team members learn so much and are so much more knowledgeable about how to make more sustainable decisions on behalf of the project and beyond," Principal Jenn Rezeli explains.
RVA distinguishes itself even among other firms with green buildings in their portfolio. For example: more than 50 percent of RVA projects meet the Architecture 2030 Challenge; more than fifty percent of its projects are built on brownfields or infill sites; more than 25 percent of its projects exceed local storm water management codes by at least 40 percent; and more than sixty percent of its suppliers are local; and, not surprisingly, more than 75 percent of its staff are LEED Accredited Professionals.
RVA has gone well beyond Green Building 101, and by acting as teachers, as well as architects, the firm helps ensure that its sustainable buildings become occupied by sustainable businesses too.
http://www.care2.com/causes/trailblazers/blog/removing-barriers-to-green-building/
Katie Kerr runs communications for B Lab, the nonprofit which certifies B Corporations. Certified B Corporations are a new type of corporation which uses the power of business to solve social and environmental problems. To read more of her writing, visit blog.bcorporation.net.
In Australia, you can now specify a green electricity supply, but they will charge you more for the privilege. However, a new company promises to reverse this, predicting up to 30% savings on current bills.
The company, Greenbox, is about to implement a model developed in Europe, where customers are rewarded for energy savings. Executive director Simon Barnes has been quoted as saying, "We figured out that the best way to monetise energy efficiency is through better wholesale management. We have an integrated system which monitors and manages energy in the home -- and monitors and manages energy consumption in the wholesale market. We can optimise the value of whole energy chain. We think we've cracked all of the problems we needed. That's why this business is so unique. We've designed i-Tunes for the energy industry."
Depression is NOT a Chemical Imbalance in Your Brain -- Here's Proof by Dr Mercola
Dr Mercola's web site has an excellent documentary detailing how the psychiatric drug industry was born and its powerful and profitable partnership with the drug industry, which has turned psychiatry into an $80 billion drug profit centre.
Unfortunately, the evidence is overwhelmingly stacked against psychiatric drugs. It's becoming ever clearer that most of today's psychiatric diagnoses and subsequent drug treatment is a sham, successfully promoted to make you believe it's based on some scientific truth.
But it's not...
Answering this question is the holy grail of psychiatry. Even before there were psychiatrists, such troubles were blamed on things like evil spirits, or an imbalance of "humors."
The latter was treated by bloodletting, which is perhaps the longest running tradition in medicine, originating in the ancient civilizations of Egypt and Greece, persisting for some 2,500 years through the Industrial Revolution. It was the "aspirin" of the day, used for just about every conceivable condition from pneumonia to depression. Yet, there was never any evidence that it did any good, and many times the patients died. Of course, it was always assumed it was the disease that killed them, rather than the treatment.
Interestingly, we now know that there was good reason why this may have helped men or postmenopausal women. If they had high iron levels this would have been able to reduce their load and thus improve their overall health.
Finally, 19th century scientists began to question its value and medical statisticians who tracked case histories discovered that it wasn't helping much of anything.
The blanket prescription of drugs for every conceivable psychological hiccup has become the bloodletting theory of the 21st century... Of course, in the case of psychiatric drugs, there's tremendous profits to be made by maintaining the status quo and not admitting the error of their ways.
The fact is, psychiatry STILL doesn't understand what causes psychological distress, and the primary theory proposed; the idea that unwanted behavior and depression are due to an imbalance of serotonin and dopamine in your brain, has NEVER been proven.
On the contrary, research has proven the theory is WRONG, yet this evidence has been swept under the proverbial rug.
Despite what the slick advertisements say, psychotropic drugs have no measurable biological imbalances to correct -- unlike other drugs that can measurably alter levels of blood sugar, cholesterol and so on.
"How can you medicate something that is not physically there?" they ask in this documentary.
The answer is, of course, you can't!
Doing so anyway is a dangerous game.
There is a lot more, all good stuff. Read on.
The male sexual organs are a complex and well orchestrated center of sensitivity and functionality. Unfortunately, rarely do the questions concerning this organ system evolve beyond the issue of size. The confusion between genital size and sexual satisfaction is perhaps one of the most damaging and rampant sexual myths on the planet. Teasing apart the insecurity and confidence that defines our sexual selves comes for both men and women through a maturing comfort with our bodies' erotic instruments.
The anxiety that many if not most men feel about their penis size is as universal as the misconception that it is the penis that is the ringleader when it comes to sexual satisfaction and prowess. "We equate masculinity and power with penis size," says Ira Sharlip, MD, clinical professor of urology at the University of California at San Francisco and president of the International Society for Sexual Medicine. "Of course, there's really no relationship." Still, Sharlip says, "all" of his patients want to increase their penis size. The anxiety attached to penis size has shown up in many studies, where men clearly overestimate the size of the average penis and consistently underestimate their own by comparison. For the record, the average male penis is flaccid (not erect): from 3.4 inches to 3.7 inches (8.6 cm to 9.3 cm), erect from 5.1 inches to 5.7 inches (12.9 cm to 14.5 cm) and average penis girth (circumference when erect): from 3.5 inches to 3.9 inches (8.8 cm to 10 cm).
Sadly, many other studies confirm this same finding, that men tend to compare themselves in a way that is likely to end up with a negative evaluation. This might be, in part, because most pornographic depiction of penis size does not reflect the average man's penis. He got the job because he was so big... Even men who are considering the painful process of surgical penile enlargement more often than not have average size penises even though they would describe themselves as having unusually small penises.
Wendy Strgar, owner of Good Clean Love, is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love and family. Wendy helps couples tackle the questions and concerns of intimacy and relationships, providing honest answers and innovative advice. Wendy lives in Eugene, Oregon with her husband, a psychiatrist, and their four children ages 11-20.
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/does-size-matter.html#ixzz1HZfMdzlQ
The University of Queensland has released an exciting study for anyone looking to lose weight. Researchers found that the gentle yet powerful exercise known as tai chi helps with obesity and excess weight, in a number of ways. The scientists discovered that tai chi:
Founded in China thousands of years ago, tai chi is a graceful set of gentle movements designed to improve the flow of chi--energy--throughout the body, promoting health and healing. This form of exercise is suitable for most people, including those suffering from injuries and illness.
This exciting new research proves the effectiveness of an ancient mind-body healing practice that has been in use for thousands of years in China.
Michelle Schoffro Cook, MSc, RNCP, ROHP, PhD, is an international best-selling and seven-time book author and doctor of traditional natural medicine, whose works include: The Life Force Diet, The Ultimate pH Solution, The 4-Week Ultimate Body Detox Plan, The Phytozyme Cure and HealthSmart News. Learn more at www.DrMichelleCook.com.
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/tai-chi-diet-depression.html#ixzz1ERce2oHl.
Michelle didn't say, but Tai Chi is actually a martial art. By moving very slowly and gracefully, you train yourself to be able to execute certain movements with great force and speed. Like many eastern martial arts, it is also training in inner strength. I recommend it for that reason to many of my clients. A Tough Lesson in Humility by Delia Quigley
"Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." Proverbs 16:18
There is a man I know, who is a good man, and well liked by family and friends. He is a carpenter by trade and likes to tell how he once could throw 80 pounds over his shoulder and then climb a ladder to the roof. When I first met him, about six years ago, he was strong and healthy, helping me out by maneuvering the rototiller around my garden with impressive ease.
About three years ago he began an introspection of his own character and decided that he was lacking in humility. Stubborn and prideful he would accept help from no one. Living alone in the woods with his tools, his red hen pecking around the garden and his carpenter shop overlooking the river below, life was good and no one could tell him otherwise.
Then one day he prayed that he might learn humility. He asked for a lesson that would allow him to release his arrogance and independence and that this might make him a better person. When nothing immediately materialized in response to his prayer, he forgot about it and went on with his life. Except something began to happen to his body and over the course of days, weeks and months he slowly lost feeling in his legs and feet, so that walking and balance became more and more difficult. Finally, and after much persuading, he went to the doctor and was diagnosed with diabetes complicated by Lyme disease. -- a brutal and crippling assault on his immune system that has left him dependent on family and friends to survive.
"I've had a lot of time now to think," he recently told me, "and that I asked for this lesson. 'Course I didn't expect it would come in the form that it did, but otherwise I never would have known the absolute unconditional love that has come into my life. And that I would accept people's help! I have been humbled, not so much by the disease itself, but by the outpouring of love from those around me."
Some may think that this was a harsh lesson to call upon yourself, so I called to ask if he thought the lesson was worth what he is now going through. And he told me, "Yes! Because, what is really showing up is this incredible trust and generosity. Some people have put out large sums of money to save my home, without even asking for anything in return. It is a throw back to the old days when your handshake or your word was good enough, that you would do anything on the up and up. I am humbled by how people are not asking for payback, they just want to help."
I suggest that his lesson in humility is providing others with the opportunity to become better people. "And that is the other side of the coin. You can look at either side and see it as an opportunity or a loss. When I look at my pride, honor and dignity, I see that the key to breaking those apart is you need humility. That is your "Get out of jail card." I am inspired by great men such as, Mandela and Gandhi who had the power to motivate people and chose a humble role of sacrifice in order to change people. I'm not saying that is what I have done, only that people have responded to my situation with so much trust and honesty. It's a beautiful thing, Delia, a beautiful thing."
Delia Quigley is the Director of StillPoint Schoolhouse, where she teaches a holistic lifestyle based on her 28 years of study, experience and practice. She is the creator of the Body Rejuvenation Cleanse, Cooking the Basics, and Broken Bodies Yoga. Delia's credentials include author, holistic health counselor, natural foods chef, yoga instructor, energy therapist and public speaker. Follow Delia's blogs: brcleanse.blogspot.com and brokenbodiesyoga.wordpress.com. To view her website go to www.deliaquigley.com.
Creativity, according to 'The Oxford Companion to the Mind' (1987), is the use of the imagination or original ideas, especially in the production of an artistic work. That is, it's not the production of certain results such as music, art or scientific theories, but the mental processes that lead to such products. Creativity is a way of life.
By definition, creative people are imaginative and original. This makes them act differently from others and the pressure from peer groups is to conform, to copy, to act like everyone else in the group.
The creative process often involves joy. All the same, it is also full of anguish.
Research shows that creativity and psychological disorders share a common set of traits. Simonton (2004), Post (1996), and Peterson, Smith, and Carsons (2002) argue that creators will commonly exhibit symptoms often associated with psychological disorders. A new study suggests that bipolar disorder (but also other types of Mental Anguish) and creativity actually share a common root (New Scientist, 29 October, p.40).
Creativity can be used as therapy. Many sufferers with bipolar or depression use their creativity to their advantage.
People experience the creative process in two distinct ways. To give an example, here is what Dr Bob Rich writes:
My creativity is in top gear when I forget that I as a person even exist, and am fully involved in the task. It then flows of its own accord. When I am writing like this, I don't feel I own the words. I am merely a conduit for them. They come through me, not from me.
And this, in contrast is what I wrote:
...for me the real creative genius derives from my creative anguish, which is neither depression nor mania.
My creative anguish has elements of both mania and depression, which alternate rapidly yet is neither. This is because if I was experiencing mania proper, I would not be able to achieve much since my mind would be all over the place and I would not be able to focus enough to produce anything of substance. Similarly, if depressed, I would not have the inspiration or the energy to do anything constructive or creative.
From my personal research, I find that both these views are correct. The first is much like mindfulness or being totally involved in the moment and the task at hand; or they feel creative anguish, which is a kind of twilight zone feeling where the person is somehow trapped in two different worlds; alternatively, the creative person may experience both creative processes at alternative times. That is my case.
More interestingly, the creative anguish seems to have a life of its own and I am sure that it is something which has been experienced by all great artists and scientists. So, what exactly is the nature of this creative anguish?
I feel that the creative anguish is a state of mind that can either lead to the achievement of self-fulfillment, inner peace and contentment, or it can lead to self-destruction.
For it to lead to enlightenment it has to be combined with developed wisdom, critical consciousness and the desire to be as close as possible to the truth.
In this attempt the artist, who in my opinion is both someone who suffers with a psychological disorder and a very creative person, is somehow able to understand that the creative life is a paradox and that it embraces at once elements of madness and of sanity. Indeed humans can only arrive at some enlightenment if they are able to find a balance between madness and sanity, because both are part of life.
Like electricity can only exist when there is a positive and negative charge, so too the artist needs to experience both madness and sanity and somehow learn to live in both frames of mind without hurting anyone and using these forces to propel humanity toward greater achievements.
In addition, the artist must come to understand that what we call madness is a kind of inner suffering which seeks resolution of some kind. It is not at all an illness.
Matisse and Picasso had well understood this, for their art always had a hold on reality but broadened the margins of reality to include the dream and the human spirit. Their art is testament that we need to seek a balance between madness and sanity.
According to my idea, which one day I hope to transform into a theory of creative anguish, creativity plus anguish, wisdom, knowledge and inner exploration leads to enlightenment. A person who suffers with a psychological disorder and is able to reach this enlightened position is no longer at the mercy of symptoms for he or she has found peace and harmony.
Below there is a painting titled "Dreams" which I have made recently and which is included to demonstrate how the art of Picasso and Matisse can be combined because essentially both artists were trying to do the same thing: show that reality can be seen from a novel perspective. Have they been able to achieve enlightenment? Probably not but they were well on the way to do so. It takes a lifetime and courage to accept the complexity of life for this acceptance is the key to inner peace.
Uncontrollable anger
Hi my name is Jim and I am looking for help I had a very bad childhood watching my parents fight physically with one another, they never abused me but now I have this uncontrollable anger and I have taken it out on animals in the past. My girlfriend just got a puppy and I have recently started again and I know mass murderers have come from backgrounds like mine but I haven't ever harmed another person and have no desire. I'm hoping that you can help because it's hard to find any kind of help for a person like me hurting an animal is looked down upon very harshly.
Hi Jim,
There is research showing that kids watching violence between parents can become significantly traumatized. However, this is not invariable. Some do, some don't.
Also, you can use the adults in your childhood in two ways: as models to follow, and as negative models so you do the opposite to them.
In fact, I am sure both your mom and dad had some wonderful qualities. You can examine what they did, and choose those aspects you admire, and those you hate. Then of course copy the bits you approve of, and do the opposite regarding the bits you don't like.
And Jim, you do not have uncontrollable anger. You have a habit of feeling anger, and have not learned how to respond to these feelings in a way that you approve of. Both these habits can be changed, if you have the motivation and perseverance to change them.
I read behind your message that actually hate violence and cruelty, and are horrified by your impulses to want to hurt animals. So, you are clear on how you want to live your life. All you need to do to get there is to break some long-standing habits. And you are fortunate: you have a girlfriend who can be your helper in this.
First, read http://anxietyanddepression-help.com/habit.html.
The best way of getting rid of an unwanted habit is to put a new competing habit in its place. When you are in the presence of this puppy or any other vulnerable animal, deliberately and consciously do something that makes this little being feel good. Then congratulate yourself and feel good about having caused pleasure.
As a matter of safety, at first ensure that you are not alone with the pup. Tell your girlfriend you are making this change and ask her to do two things. When you manage to do the new Jim and are kind to the pup, she should show her acknowledgement. If you look like you might be slipping back to the old habit, then she is to say something like "Jim, remember, you're not doing that any more." Then both of you need to forgive you, and you need to do something to make the puppy feel good.
What gets in the way? Being harsh with yourself, telling yourself nasty things about Jim. Also, fighting any impulses you disapprove of. If the thought comes "That bloody pooch would make a good football" or something, you didn't ask for the thought. It just came. You are not guilty of anything, UNLESS you put it into practice. You are what you do, not what you think.
So acknowledge the thought or urge. It's OK to have thought that, but you don't need to believe it. Don't fight it -- just treat it like noise.
One trick is to extend it with an "AND." "That bloody pooch would make a good football AND my job now is to be kind to the little person."
You have control over what you DO. So, live up to your principles and do good, and do well.
You can.
:)
Thank you Very much Bob. I actually am seeing a therapist now which is helping a lot I thank you for taking the time to help a stranger. I will use the tools you have given to me and any other helpful tips you have to offer.
When I was in grade school, I had a difficult time socializing with people. I had friends, but most of them went to other schools. At some point during high school, I managed to change things around, and became very social. Life was good.
I got married this last April, and 6 months later my wife left me and moved to Colorado. I spent about a month sulking in my room afterwards. Since then, I have had myself prescribed anti-depressants. I find most social situations slightly unnerving, and the last time I went to the bar I had a mild anxiety attack, which has never happened to me before.
Question: What can I do to get myself back on the right track? I don't like being an anti-socialite, but putting myself in intense social situations like the bar and large parties kind of scares me a little. I can't strike up conversations with people, I can't small talk, and even if someone else is leading the conversation I find it hard sometimes to go beyond one word answers.
Dear Sam,
You are in a state of grief. You have suffered a major loss, and it is entirely normal and reasonable that you should grieve for it.
What's more, your way of seeing the world has changed, for the worse. You committed yourself, and made yourself vulnerable to hurt from another person -- and she hurt you. So now, understandably, you expect to be hurt from any future commitments.
I suspect also, partly or wholly, you look on the end of your marriage as having happened because you feel as if something was wrong with you. It may feel that she left you because of something(s) you did wrong, and because you are faulty and not deserving of love.
So, of course you're depressed and keep your own company and suffer anxiety where you're in a potentially hurtful situation.
Grief is like a broken bone. It hurts. Given a chance, it heals, but that takes time. And things can interfere with the normal course of healing.
One of these potential troublemakers is if you look on yourself as faulty because she left you. Best is not to blame yourself, not to blame her, but to look on the marriage and its breakup as a mismatch. Things went wrong. What can you learn from it, so that next time you can do it better?
You see, there is a view of people that is very empowering. I think of myself, you, every person on this planet like this:
You are perfect.
There are no such things as faults, defects or mistakes, just opportunities for improvement. So, when you feel up to it, think about what you could have done differently. This will come under several headings:
SELECTION
If I'd known A, B, C and D about this girl, would I have married her?
Why didn't I notice these differences from me, these issues, at the very start?
What will I look for in a lady the next time, when I am ready to try again?
How will I ensure that I don't repeat the same mistakes and be blinded by attraction to future problem issues?
EARLY PROBLEMS
When the first tensions arose, how should I have handled them? (There are ALWAYS differences and tensions between any two people.) In that regard, you can learn a lot about how to handle relationships from http://anxietyanddepression-help.com/relationships.html
You might consider seeking couples counseling very early in the relationship, to ensure a smooth start. Most people don't even realize that help is available and effective, and if they do, they seek it too late.
MAJOR PROBLEMS
She may have been unhappy and hurting. Was there anything I could have done differently to help her? Could we have sought counseling?
What was my contribution to the breakup? This is not blame, but looking for how you can learn from the experience. Next time, you want to do it better.
Forget the bars and parties. Instead, get involved in activities where you'll meet people who share some things with you already.
What were the activities (other than bars and parties) you enjoyed before you got married? Do you have any passions, things you've felt strongly about? How about sports, or playing music, or volunteering, or political activism? If you believe in God, did you go to church?
Rejoin life by returning to an improved version of what you used to do a couple of years ago. Also, do the things you wished to do then but never got to.
If you didn't have passions then, develop them now. Learn new skills, enrol in courses of study. The best thing is if you can find activities that are of benefit to other people.
When you do this, you will start feeling better about yourself. Your grief will still be there for a while, but when you are busy with other things, it will recede to the background.
And when you are doing such things you'll meet new people. Some of them will be attractive girls, or have friends/relations who are. Don't aim for a romance with them, but friendship.
When you are ready, one of them will flower. And this time, because you have learned from your breakup, you will do it better.
Sam, this is the chance to build a GOOD life for yourself.
I have been on medications for 5 years now. So far i have kept my self out of the hospital. Today I feel like I need to go back but cant bring my self to do it.
I need some help trying not to kill myself. I feel my world is crashing. I give and give and give till i cant anymore Its time for CRASH City. do you have any suggestions that i can do Right now to stop these feelings? I beg of you to HELP me PLEase.
Dear Cathy,
Depression is the pits, isn't it? I've been there, suffered it for many years, and have got permanently out of it. If I could do it, so can you. I don't know the specifics of your situation, but your few words trigger some of my cliches:
YOU CAN'T CARE FOR OTHERS UNTIL YOU CARE FOR THE CARER FIRST.
You are not doing anyone any favors by giving and giving until you destroy yourself. You, like everyone else, deserve joy, fun, contentment. The way to make it easier to give to all those other people is to add one more person to the list of those who receive. That's you. And you need to be on top of the list.
How? Go to http://anxietyanddepression-help.com/firstaid.html and read the seven measures for maximizing your resilience. Implement these seven measures, and you will be able to stand up to anything.
IF SOMETHING WORKS, DO MORE OF IT. IF IT DOESN'T WORK, DO SOMETHING ELSE.
For five years, you've been trying to use prescription drugs to fight the problem. They haven't worked. So, why continue? In fact, some of these drugs have a paradoxical side-effect for some people of increasing suicidal ideation.
There is a great deal of research evidence that the effectiveness of antidepressants has been overstated through research sponsored by the pharmaceutical companies, and by the suppression of studies with negative results. They do have their place, but it is limited. They are powerful, damaging chemicals and should only be used short term (if at all).
However, do not get off your drug in an uncontrolled way. Go to your physician and demand to be weaned off the drug gradually, under medical supervision.
Find yourself a good psychologist, and engage in psychotherapy. It is effective, and what's more, when it's over the tools you have learned are for life.
DEPRESSION IS A PRISON, BUT THE DOOR IS UNLOCKED.
When the sad thoughts and feelings come, they are just unimportant inner events, until you believe them. If you argue with them, fight them, that gives them power. If you believe them, that gives them power. However, if you simply laugh at them, allow them to be there but pay no attention, then they stop running your life. Most people can share a room with a TV set with images doing their thing on the screen, and voices coming from it, and yet be involved in something else and not even aware of what program is on. Treat your negative inner thoughts, images, emotions in the same way. They are there, so what.
Another way of presenting the same point is: when you were a little girl, a monster moved into your life. Her aim is to kill you, as slowly and painfully as possible. So, within your mind, you have Cathy thoughts and monster thoughts. Once you are able to distinguish them, the monster thoughts will lose their power.
Cathy, you can do this. Some of what I have said is against the dictates of the culture. But the culture is crazy. Gain power by thinking for yourself.
You can do it.
There is an ever-increasing list of well-performed studies published in peer-reviewed journals to show that talk therapies work, when compared to drugs. A recent one is by Z.V. Segal et al, from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto.
They studied 160 patients age 18 to 65 who met criteria for major depressive disorder and had experienced at least two episodes of depression. They gave these people antidepressants till things were OK, then put them on one of three maintenance regimes to reduce the chance of a relapse.
These were continuation of the drug, replacement of the drug with a placebo, or mindfulness-based cognitive therapy.
Relapse rate was 60% for the placebo group after 18 months, about 40% for the other two groups with no significant difference between them. This shows that the talk therapy did as well as the drug.
This is yet another valuable demonstration, but I object to the underlying logic. These people are treated with drugs that only work while you take them, with dreadful side effects and even worse withdrawal symptoms, and then, when and if they have achieved relief from depression (which happens without treatment in a great number of cases, till the next episode), then at last you do therapy. The therapy involves changes in habitual thinking, therefore it is not something that needs to be applied anew forever. It has only good side effects and no withdrawal effects at all. So, why not use it up front, instead of the nasty drugs?
Segal, Z.V. et al., Antidepressant monotherapy vs sequential pharmacotherapy and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, or placebo, for relapse prophylaxis in recurrent depression. Archives of General Psychiatry, 2010; 67(12): 1256-1264
http://www.medpagetoday.com/Psychiatry/Depression/23798
How to do a book review
A book review is a very specific art form. It has certain clear objectives that are sometimes not met, and should be free of some content you often find.
The aim of a book review is to enable its reader to make a judgment about a book: "do I want to read this?" It should be accurate, and while it is the reviewer's opinion, it should be as free as possible of the reviewer's prejudices and biases.
One of my rules is, if I don't think a book is a good buy, I won't offer a public review, although, if the author wants it, I am willing to give private reasons for the refusal. This is because even the worst book is somebody's beloved baby I don't want to trample on.
Everything has good and bad points. It is a matter of honesty that any faults you find should be pointed out so that the reader can decide whether they matter sufficiently not to bother with this title. However, a hatchet job says more bad things about the reviewer than about the book or its author. And there are ways to put negatives.
The best way is to follow the Toastmaster formula for feedback: describe all the good things in the performance (in this case, the book), make any necessary suggestions for improvement, and then finish with a compliment.
A book review is not a synopsis. It is a bad mistake to give a blow by blow of what the book is about, particularly to reveal any surprise twists in it. Enough of the content should be mentioned to show the reader that you have in fact read the book, and to give a flavour of genre, setting, plot, characters -- and that's all.
Reading a book in order to review it is not the same as reading it for pleasure. It pays to take notes as you are reading, and to keep in mind the criteria for good writing, for example as set out in the criteria for the latest EPIC contest for e-books.
"Omniscient point of view" is a highfaluting name for head hopping. Don't do it.
The idea is that the author reports the inner events -- perceptions, thoughts, emotions, images, memories, urges -- of any and all characters.
I think of creative writing as having a scene, and a witness for the scene. In journalistic writing, the witness is always the author. That's why a synonym for "journalist" is "reporter." However, in the nature of things, the journalist cannot report inner events for the people in the story, only what they say and do. After all, few journalists are mind-readers.
In contrast to journalism, in fiction the writer should be invisible. As reader, I should not be constantly (or even occasionally) reminded that this is only a story after all. For the writing to work, I should get drawn into an illusion that it is happening, and I am there, being a part of it, or at the minimum observing it directly.
So, in fiction, the witness to the scene should be one of the characters, NOT the author. This creates the illusion we want, of having the reader submerged in the created reality of the story.
If the character who is the current witness is a mind-reader, then fair enough, the thoughts read by this person can be reported. But even then, they will be reported from the point of view of the witness: "Looking at Susie's eyes, Peter heard her unspoken thought that..."
This is very different from head hopping, aka omniscient POV. There, we have Peter's inner events revealed, and then the next paragraph (or sometimes in the same one), we are given Susie's. The reader is the mind-reader, not the character.
This doesn't work in writing because it doesn't work in real life. If the writing is to create the illusion that the story is real life, then it needs to mimic real life in all relevant ways.
So, pick a witness for the scene. This is typically the character with the most at stake. Present that person's world from the inside. This includes what other characters say and do, don't say and don't do: observables available to the witness. If you do this well enough, some readers at least will identify so much with the character's experiences that they temporarily BECOME the character. Even for others, there will be the illusion of reality. That's the aim of fiction writing.
FOR JUDGES:
Call out from EPIC, the Electronic Publishing Industry Coalition:
EPIC eBook Award Competition is looking for industry professional judges: published authors, publishers, and/or editors. If you are interested, please go to: http://bitly.com/eBookJudging and complete the form. If you are an author and enter the competition, you will not be assigned to judge in any categories you enter. You will be contacted during the last two weeks of May to confirm your continued judging availability. EPIC thanks you in advance for your willingness to participate.
EPIC's eBook Award Competition opens June 1 and closes July 15. The time frames for judging are:
Preliminary Round judging, June 5 through July 22
Thank you for your interest.
FOR ENTRIES:
EPIC's eBook Award Competition invites you to submit entries to our premiere eBook competition, one that recognizes excellence in ePublished works. We will open for entries June 1 through July 15. Entries must be published in English, include a publication date, be submitted "as the product sells," and be released for sale between June 1, 2010, through May 31, 2011. This includes self- and subsidy-published books.
If you are interested in our competition, please go to: www.epicorg.com and review our eBook Guide and FAQs.
Thank you for your interest,
It gives me a great pleasure to invite you to this forthcoming international seminar event which the World Social Humanitarian Foundation (WSHF) is excited to be hosting in May 16th to 20th 2011 at Executive Conference Center, 137 Iffley Road, Oxford, OX4 1EJ London England, and from May 23rd to 27th 2011 at Le Meridien President Pointe des Almadies, BP 8181, Senegal West Africa.
The theme of the forth coming seminar is; Human Right and Pretension. Delegates who are interested are to make a paper presentation and also advice to make a summary presentation on the above subject.
On behalf of the Organizing Committee, I request you to kindly extend your cooperation by giving wide publicity to this workshop by sharing this invitation among your staff, members or relatives for their active participation in the workshop.
Note: the W.S.H.F. will be providing all delegates with to and fro air ticket and also visa guidance for the seminar purpose for both countries. Looking forward for your cooperation and support for the success of the workshop.
Registration is open for the seminar! Contact the organizing secretary Prof. Benjamin Kenwood for more information regarding registration. Email: (wshfsecretary@aim.com).
You can also contact me with my personal email adders bellow if you need further assistant to participate in this seminar.
Hope to see you at the Seminar venue.
Best Regards
Hi Bob,
I just wanted to let you know that Over the Top & Back Again has been named a finalist in the Book of the Year Award competition by ForeWord Reviews. (Yes, I'm also surprised.) There were 1400 entries from 350 publishers. They'll decide the medal award winners in June at the American Library Association Conference.
Thanks for your help in making this possible!
Cheers,
OVER THE TOP & BACK AGAIN: Hiking X the Alps -- 2010 Book of the Year Award Finalist, ForeWord Reviews.
"Marvelous account...told with a fine eye for detail and a keen sense of humor." ~ Royal Robbins, climbing pioneer | "Brilliantly accessible and wonderfully subversive." ~ Richard Bangs, legendary adventurer | available at Amazon.com | Preview it at Pilgrim's Tales. | Join us on Facebook.
Carolyn Howard-Johnson's short story "Truth, Fiction, Denial: A Big Bass Story" is a finalist for the Eric Hoffer Prose Award where it will also be considered for inclusion in Best New Writing, edited by Christopher Klim.
Klim says, "Finalists are a very small group of stories from among thousands of submissions." Winners are announced in early fall of 2011.
Howard-Johnson is an award-winning novelist and poet; her fiction and poetry have appeared in literary journals nationwide and she is listed as a poet with Poets & Writers magazine. She was named Woman of the Year in Arts and Entertainment by the 43rd and 44th Districts of the California Legislature. She speaks on Utah's culture, tolerance and subjects relating to writing and publishing and has appeared on TV and hundreds of radio stations nationwide. She is also is an instructor for UCLA Extension's Writers' Program. Her Web site is www.howtodoitfrugally.com and she blogs at Writer's Digest 101 Best Websites pick, www.sharingwithwriters.blogspot.com.
Learn more about the Eric Hoffer award at www.hofferaward.com.
Learn more about Best New Writing at www.BestNewWriting.com.
The April 2011 issue of the Bainstorming blog is now live at http://www.darrellbain.com/
Subjects this month: Arranging a wish, Doggie Biscuit! revised and discounted in ebook form until mid-April, Very aggravating radio interview, Our crazy disease, Why men are attracted to breasts (comments welcomed and will be printed in the May Bainstorming if desired), Awful root canal and extraction for me and Betty, Progress report, Book reviews, Excerpt from Medics Wild, Complete long report on very aggravating interview.
Darrell Bain
The generational sequel to The Roux in the Gumbo.
It stands on its own. 90 percent truth of my life story but I ain't saying what is or what ain't truth. Also available on Kindle.
www.kim-robinson.com
The Great Disruption by Paul Gilding reviewed by Dr Bob Douglas
"Can we afford to save civilization or would we rather keep the energy costs down while we hurtle off the cliff into collapse?"
"The great disruption" is a stimulating, indeed an uplifting book by a writer who presents his arguments with blunt passion and careful attention to detail. Paul Gilding was the CEO of Greenpeace International before working as a sustainability consultant to the CEOs of a number of the largest and most successful businesses in the world.
Gilding argues that economic growth has no future in a world that is already overstretched beyond its capacity to replenish resources. He believes we are approaching a period of massive instability, precipitated by climate change, but resulting from the combination of human population and economic growth. We are now facing limits imposed by physics, chemistry and biology, because the Earth is now full. Despite human brilliance at technological innovation, our current naive faith in economic growth as a solution to our difficulties will inevitably fail us and we will hit the wall probably quite soon.
The problem is not only climate change but also the massive destruction of the ecosystems on which our lives and livelihoods depend. Gilding has no doubt that we can get through the serious crises and disruption that now lie in wait for humanity. Indeed he finds the challenge positively exhilarating. He argues that the great disruption will bring out the very best of human innovation, compassion and community spirit, although we cannot now avoid chaos and misery for millions and perhaps billions during the transition period.
He says that a successful outcome requires that we will reinvent the human economy. When the world finally accepts the seriousness and inevitability of our predicament, we will respond by unleashing massive ingenuity and capacity to adapt. "Our species is slow but not stupid," he says. We will be forced to change from shopping and overwork to sharing and enjoying our leisure time, our communities and our relationships. Because we must, we will share the world's resources with those who are in poverty. And we will all enjoy life more. Continuation of the current consumerist culture now does little for human wellbeing in developed countries like Australia and has huge crippling costs.
Gilding uses the rapid transformation that occurred as the Allied Powers responded to Hitler's invasion of Poland and the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbour, as evidence of the capacity of human societies to transform and lift themselves to new heights of capacity, communal understanding and support at stunningly short notice. In that situation, as with the one that now faces us, human societies were very slow to act, but once committed, the results were extraordinary.
The climate crisis is only one of a series of interconnected challenges, which now face humanity as we contemplate a population of 9 billion people by 2050. Food insecurity, water availability, heating of the planet and the destruction of ecosystems are all associated with our pathological addiction to economic growth. Furthermore, he says, it is economic growth that has contributed to growing inequity in the distribution of resources even though it has also lifted millions out of poverty.
Gilding has great respect for the market and also for the role which economic growth has played in the past. But economic growth is over and the market will only serve society if it is regulated to do so. The problem is, we have now passed the planet's limits to growth. We must rethink the human strategy. Inevitably, he says, the dam of denial that it is holding up global action on anthropogenic global warming will collapse and we will act rapidly and with great ingenuity and effect. The sooner the tipping point arrives that will unite the world around the seriousness and mitigation of the gathering storm, the better.
But while we wait for that to happen, millions of people and groups around the world are preparing the building blocks for a new stable state economy that will replace our growth addiction. For a while, the growth addicts will continue to use the growth model to tackle climate change and fight what the author describes as "the 1 degree war". This is the requirement that we reduce the world's carbon emissions budget to one that is compatible with no more than a 1 degree rise in planetary temperature above preindustrial levels. Currently, we are heading for at least 2 degrees and possibly much more, which would be catastrophic.
This is an optimistic book written by a clear thinker. Gilding shares with the reader his personal journey to these conclusions and the anxieties and uncertainties he has experienced along the way. He also anticipates and deals with many counterarguments to his optimism. He says that the challenge is not only for big business and government, but especially for ordinary people everywhere. Together we must take charge of the restructuring of society and the economy in ways that serve both humanity and our precious environment.
I found little to disagree with in this important work. Perhaps that is because I have been wrestling for some years with many of the same ideas as have tantalized Gilding for much of his life. This is a book that deserves to be read by people of all ages from many walks of life and especially those in business and government. Young people concerned about tomorrow's world will find meaning and hope here.
Professor Bob Douglas is a distinguished retired epidemiologist who currently Chairs SEE-Change ACT and has spent the past ten years as Chair of Australia21. We are both members of Transform Australia.
Emeritus Professor Bob Douglas AO is a retired epidemiologist who was from 1989 to 2001 the first Director of the National Centre for Epidemiology and Population Health at the Australian National University. From 2001 to 2011 he was the Founding Chair of Australia 21 www.australia21.org.au and since 2006 has been Chair of SEE-Change ACT www.seechange. org.au. He can be contacted by email.
Bob and I became friends at the first workshop of Transform Australia.
He is the author of a very impressive 77 page manual for a pilot study in 20 Canberra schools: "2020 Vision: How will we change?" The aim of the project is to examine how Canberra can be transformed into a sustainable city.
I found the manual to be accurate, easy to understand and powerful. The first parts are scary, because they set out the problem: climate change, ecological destruction, resource depletion, population growth. However, once we get past the problem and the evidence for it, we arrive at the justification of the title. There is hope.
Don't wait for the pilot study to be completed, and evaluated, and argued over. Grab the manual, and do your best to act on its contents NOW.
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A Precedents Day Message:
Do We Take a Cue From Egypt... Or Stay Stuck in "We-Gypped?"
by Swami Beyondananda
George Washington
Abraham Lincoln
Swami Beyondananda
Environment
Green electricity, cheaper
Green building in Philadelphia
by Katie Kerr
Green electricity, cheaper
Health
Does (penis) size matter? by Wendy Strgar
Tai Chi to Lose Weight and Ease Depression by Michelle Schoffro Cook
Depression is NOT a Chemical Imbalance in Your Brain -- Here's Proof
from Dr MercolaWhat Causes Psychological Distress?
Does (penis) size matter?
by Wendy Strgar
Tai Chi to Lose Weight and Ease Depression
Michelle Schoffro Cook
Deeper Issues
Creativity and madness by Alfredo Zotti
A Tough Lesson in Humility
by Delia Quigley
Creativity and madness
by Alfredo Zotti
Psychology
She wrecked my life by leaving me
Trying not to kill myself
Mindfulness-based therapy helps prevent depression relapse
Uncontrollable anger
Bob
She wrecked my life by leaving me
Some of the things you do are excellent.
Some of the things you do are OK.
And some of the things you do are the growing opportunities.How to move forward?
Trying not to kill myself
Bob
Mindfulness-based therapy helps prevent depression relapse
Writing
Omniscient POV
How to do a book review
Omniscient POV
What my friends want you to know
The premier contest for e-books
International humanitarian conference
Over the Top & Back Again is an Award finalist
Another award for Carolyn
April Bainstorming
New book from Kim Robinson
The premier contest for e-books
First Round judging, July 27 through September 7.
Final Round of judging, September 17 through October 12.
Debi Sullivan
EPIC's Competitions Chair
competitions@epicorg.com.
International humanitarian conference
Ms. Ruthie Epstei
ruthieepstei_1@globomail.com
Over the Top & Back Again
Brandon
Another award for Carolyn
April Bainstorming
Fictionwise Author of the Year
Multiple Dream Realm and Eppie awards
See all my books at http://www.darrellbain.com
New book from Kim Robinson
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sewingsouls
Reviews
Hope for Tomorrow's World by Bob Douglas
The Great Disruption
by Paul Gilding
reviewed by Dr Bob Douglas
Hope for Tomorrow's World:
A manual developed by Professor Bob Douglas
About Bobbing Around
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